On The Run

I have been jogging a lot lately to beat the sluggishness. A friend of mine who runs triathlons really inspired me to put my health first. It was not in the words she said but by being a living breathing representative of the active life and putting her all into it. That’s a note for you fitness junkies out there, be about it and stop challenging us to random races after a drunk night out, ease us into it. Running is something I have come to enjoy not in the fanatic way but in a therapeutic sense. I go for runs on odd days separated by two to three days or even a week apart.

When I do go for a run, I always challenge myself to see how much further I can run compared to the last time and that is something to have as a human being. To test your limits and see how much pain you can endure to achieve an end. To grind through the hard, uninspired times is a tough thing but it makes you stronger somehow

I live right next to a highway going to the border so that’s my course. At 5:30 when people are knocking off from work and the traffic gets intense and people are at the stop waiting for public transport that’s when I hit the ground running.

When I’m almost out of breath and my legs are ten times heavier that’s when I get the urge to pick up speed. I’ve heard runners talk about finishing strong so that’s what I aim to do. That too is something to have and implement in your life; when you’re at the closing line that’s when you should put in maximum effort and put your best foot forward. Running puts you one on one with your inner self because that is all you have when you’re out there pounding the pavement. It’s the one thing driving you and serves as a reminder that you’re all that you have and even more profound, that you’re the only one that can stop you. You realise that in all aspects of your life only you are responsible for your losses, either you didn’t put enough effort or gave up at the slightest pain. That’s a tough pill to swallow.

Don’t give up, you only get what you give so put in 300%

When I’ve reached whichever target I had set as the finish line, I do a little shimmy and Lil B cooking dance ending off with a staggalash to celebrate. When I’m satisfied with my win, I throw myself to the ground and sit by the roadside. I should probably say ON the road because I’m usually 29cms from the yellow line. At that point I look back at the horizon from where I came; It’s clear and orange now that the sun has set, its calm only getting interrupted by oncoming traffic. About 6 18-wheeler trucks, carrying goods across the border, speed past to cool me down; their only purpose. It’s dawn and most of them honk their horn at me for some inexplicable reason. I get back up and start the painful, beautiful and soothing trek back.

On my run back my body sometimes forgets that I’m in a physical activity and my mind takes over. In that moment, I can’t feel the aches and wheezing chest and everything that bothered me that day seems so small & their solution becomes explicitly clear. Motivational speaker Brian Tracy said this about solitude and I think it applies to running; it activates your super conscious mind and your intuition. In that moment, 35 minutes if my Casio is correct, I could solve world hunger and explain the disappearance of the Malaysian plane MH 370 and the reason for the Botswana Police service helicopter BPS02 crash.

Hopefully I’ll get better at sticking to my schedule in time.  Any tips for a fitness newbie like me?

You can now find me on Facebook

You can now find me on Facebook

Thanks for the favourites :)

Thanks for the favourites :)

The Time Coldplay Saved My Lie, Twice [ UNCUT]

Last night Coldplay saved my life from a broken heart and it was not the first time Chris Martin, the King of the Morose and his band of Un-merry men came to my rescue. Some people’s love lives were fated to suck and I am one of those.

Romance for someone who grew up in front of the TV involves one-liners from Richard Gere and that prick Freddie Prinze Jr. who all conspired to plant unrealistic expectations of romance in impressionable minds of my future beaus in the late 90s. I don’t have Freddie’s dashing good looks, perfect hair and that dazzling smile that made women in the 90s swoon nor Richard’s worn-in, comfortable-in-his-own-skin older man confidence so my frame doesn’t excite the ladies all that much. To add to that I don’t trust women because my first girlfriend had put it in my head that I was her one and only but then batted her eyelids unapologetically when I found out she was seeing someone else behind my back. I am the textbook broken male with trust issues. Prior to that, the first girl I ever professed my love to, wanted to stay friends so I’d say I was ushered into romance with a baptism of fire.

If you thought that was bad, I am currently in love with a girl I can’t be with. I met her 4 summers back and had the most incredible few weeks of my life. When she went away, back to her native land, I took it like a man since it was something I had prepared myself for. Needless to say 4 weeks later the aloof machismo facade came crashing down and I barricaded myself in my room for days barely eating, showering or caring about much. At one point our song Tom’s Diner was on repeat for 2 days straight while I bellowed unashamedly and replayed scenes from all our moments spent together. So cheesy and yet so tragically beautiful.

Coldplay became my solace for healing. When Chris sang Shiver so smooth and mellow and selflessly proclaimed that he would change for his sweetheart and wait till she came back, I had my lost boo in my thoughts through all the 23224 times it was on repeat. When I finally did come out of that room smelling like wilted pride and shit-out-of-luck eau de parfum things looked a bit rosy. The days of sniffling helped build a stronger resolve to find a woman whose bosom I would lay my head on and sing Careful Where You Stand to on nights alone staring into the stars in the pergola. I achieved that 4 months later and my outlook on life improved significantly. That was only the first time Coldplay saved my life.

Coldplay came through for me again, helping me though a tough period of uncertainty. As predicted the lady I laid with found a reason not to build a life with me and left me in the lurch. The Parachutes album carried me through a rollercoaster of emotions: the shame of being unable to carry on a normal functioning relationship, the guilt of causing pain to a woman, the sadness felt for mankind and its inability to bring about world peace. Something I had done or bad vibes I had put out to the world were sending the then cruising plane of life, into a perilous tailspin.

The heaviest of all the emotions I felt, was a great insurmountable fear of the unknown; would I ever find a “bae” to sing Yellow in unison with like Jay & Beyonce did in her documentary? Or would I continue living out my life baeless sending #HeyBoo tweets and unsolicited creepy direct messages to cuties on the internet? I can’t predict the future but all I can do is hope for the best because Chris told me Everything’s Not Lost. Through the powerful lyrics delivered with enough melancholy to make Hitler weep, I was given strength to lace up my boots and go through the trenches once more. That brings me to sad, sad news I found out recently about Chris Martin’s marriage.

The split from his sub-par actress wife Gwyneth Paltrow are all over the internet. I pray that he gets through the heartache. I know poor Chris, that sweet man, could never deliberately cause anyone pain so the separation could only be caused by Gwen. I kneel before my shrine every night and light some incense and say a little prayer for Chris that he may find comfort even though his heart bleeds and his mind throbs with pain. I pray against the evils of conscious uncoupling and that the new album which I hear sounds like Parachutes and A Rush of Blood to the Head, exceeds all expectations. I pray the internet gods bless me so that these words reach you Chris so that you know that even if you’re down in the dumps, we still live in a beautiful world.

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My roll dog and I in the woods.

My roll dog and I in the woods.